


Cruelty? I've heard of her

by NateTheWolf



Series: Cruelty Series [1]
Category: Doctor Who
Genre: Aftermath of Violence, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Cutesy, F/F, Fluff and Humor, Kidnapping, Non-Graphic Violence, Teleports, alien planets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-26
Updated: 2020-01-12
Packaged: 2020-03-17 14:17:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 17,522
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18966937
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NateTheWolf/pseuds/NateTheWolf
Summary: The Doctor takes the fam to have a day out on a beautiful alien planet. They love the scenery, and the market. The day goes on pretty well; they meet a few aliens, make a friend, and have unlimited credits to spend on the market before having a picnic. However, things go awry when one member of the group doesn't come back.





	1. Bukurret!

"Bukurret!" the Doctor exclaimed as she threw her arms up in the air. “Nice little planet, just off the Hebriden system. It’s mainly rural areas, rock and grassland, maybe a village or two. In the last few years they...” 

Yaz admired how she went on her tangents about practically anything. All of them usually liked her rants too, but Graham was inpatient this time. He took a small break from travelling to focus on the house, so he was like a child waiting for ice cream at this point. 

“Doc,” he interrupted. “Can we go now?” 

“Oh, yeah,” she grinned and grabbed her coat from the console. She sprinted down to the doors, closely followed by Yaz. “C’mon fam!” 

They raced outside. The sight was breath taking. The sky was clear as ever, a mixture of purples and reds, it almost looked like a water colour painting. There were rather long strands of pale blue grass, or what seemed like grass, ahead of them that parted to the side beside a large tree of the same colour scheme, besides the ‘trunk’ being black. The fam was convinced they had just stepped into a painting rather than an alien planet. 

“Doctor,” Yaz breathed. “Just... Wow...” 

“It is isn’t it,” she beamed. “You can eat the grass too!” 

Ryan laughed a little, “Well, you can Doctor.” 

She pouted. “You can! I swear!” Just to prove her point she stormed over, grabbed a handful of grass, and shoved it in her mouth, all the time staring at Ryan. There wasn’t any point in the daring behavior, however amusing it was, since Ryan had said that she can. She spat it back out. “Okay... It doesn’t taste that nice, tastes of pears...” 

“Pears aren’t that bad,” Graham laughed and walked over to her, taking a strand out of her hand. “Let’s see,” he bit into it. “Hmm, it does taste like pears. Maybe they taste of different fruits?” 

It was Yasmin’s turn to pick at the grass, a rather darker looking one. “Oh, this one tastes like strawberry.” 

“Really?” the Doctor skipped over to her and took it out of her hand. “Oh, it does too! That’s cool!” 

Yasmin grinned at her childlike enthusiasm as she ate the strawberry flavoured grass. Ryan took one and claimed it tasted like blueberries. He shared it with Graham and talked about how crazy it was. 

“It really does look like a painting,” Yaz gestured to the sky. “How is that?” 

“It’s just how it looks here,” the Doctor shrugged. “We picked the great time of year too, the sky’s always clear for this half of the year, and then it rains to let the inhabitants have water.” 

“What about the grass? Doesn’t it dry out?” 

“No, it soaks in all the water and survives the whole year!” 

“How long is a year here, compared to earth?” Yaz looked around and unknowingly leant into the blonde. 

“Hmm,” she looked up at the sky, shielding her eyes from the sun. “If I’m remembering correctly, it’s two years? Each year on earth is half a year here.” 

“Cool,” the brunette looked up at the beautiful sky. “What’s it like at night?” 

“We can stay and find out,” the Doctor looked at her, a huge grin on her face. “I’m sure we can find a hotel of sorts, if not there’s the TARDIS.” 

“That would be great!” Yaz beamed. 

“What would be great?” Graham asked as he and Ryan joined them. 

“What do you guys think of staying here overnight?” the Doctor asked, wrapping an arm around Yaz. 

“We haven’t done that in ages,” Ryan grinned. “Are we staying in the TARDIS or?” 

“We can if we don’t find a hotel,” the blonde looked up towards the tree. “If not, we could lay out a blanket there, like a picnic! Oh, I haven’t had one of those is years!” 

“That sounds cool!” Yaz joined in with her excitement, not remembering the last time she had a picnic. Ryan glanced down at the grass. She knew what he was going to say, and thought she’d try to beat him to it. “We could eat the grass if we can’t find food?” 

“Yaz,” he whined. “You knew – Ugh, never mind.” 

“Didn’t you say something about villages Doc?” Graham interrupted, knowing that they’d act like children if they carried on. 

“Yeah!” she jumped up and skipped along the path. “Wanna see?” 

“’Course!” the fam followed her up the path. As they walked a rather short distance, they found a few huts and stalls. It seemed there was a market going on. A few people walking around the stalls and back to their homes. Most of the huts seemed to be held up by some sort of hover device, whereas the stalls were planted on the ground. 

“Ah, hello there,” a red alien greeted. He wore a silver collar that had the digital numbers 658 ingrained on it. Where the eyes would usually be on any animal, they were nowhere to be seen on the face. The ears were like a wolf’s but a tad bit longer with a scruffy bit of black fur at the tips, and black horns on his head. The overall body was covered in thick red fur, it was amazing that he wasn’t burning up. He had a dragon like nose that flared up when he grinned, his canine jagged teeth showing. When Yaz looked down she noticed he looked very anthropomorphic, and had a bandaged-up hand. 

“TARDIS translation working then,” Graham muttered to her, snapping her out of her worried thoughts for the creature. 

“Ah yes, hello. I’m the Doctor,” she grinned, and then gestured to her fam. “These are my friends, Graham, Ryan and Yaz. Are we okay to sightsee?” 

“Oh yeah, yeah,” he nodded, his ears flicked back. “Visitors are welcomed here always! Well, I hope you enjoy the market, do you have credit?” 

“Oh uh,” the Doctor patted down her coat and searched her pockets. “Hmph, no, we do not.” 

“Shame, you can’t buy anything without credit,” he frowned, genuinely upset that they couldn’t spend anything, well, as genuinely as he could look with no eyes. 

“Um, if I go back to my TARDIS to get it? I’m pretty sure I had it, must’ve left it in there,” she grinned sheepishly. “My friends can stay and talk to you; I won’t be long?” 

“Yeah, you can do that, I don’t mind the company,” the alien grinned at her. 

“Great, guys stay with... I’m sorry, what’s your name?” 

He seemed shocked at that. “Oh um, I-I'm Runt.” 

“Great name, well, guys, stay with Runt,” and she took off. 

Ryan looked at Runt up and down. “So, what are you?” 

“I’m a Nuhal,” he smiled, seemingly blushing a slight purple colour. “What are you?” 

“We’re human,” he glanced around slightly. 

“Oh, we haven’t had humans before,” his ears twitched up. “You’re good humans though, right?” 

“Yeah, we’re the good ones,” Graham reassured. 

“You look like the Albarians.” 

“Wait, you can see?” Ryan asked before anyone could stop him. He hissed once he realized what he said could be insensitive. “Sorry, uh-” 

“No, it’s alright,” Runt laughed. “Yes, I may not have eyes like you, but I can see. You guys look cool, and pretty, well, for humans.” 

“Ah, here they are!” the Doctor stopped, slightly out of breath, waving four graphite cards up. “So, Runt, can I ask about your hand?” 

“Yeah, uh, I got it jammed in a machine,” he laughed nervously. 

“Oh, that must’ve hurt,” she frowned, gaining her composure. 

“Yeah, but the pains gone now. It’s alright-” 

“658!” 

Runt flinched. “S-Sorry, I’ve got to go. Have a good day!” he waved before running off to a blue, larger alien. He looked different, and actually wore some sort of clothing. 

“Doctor,” Yaz approached her, a sad look on her face. 

“Yeah?” 

“Is Runt a slave?” 

“Appears so,” she frowned as she watched him get scolded by the apparent owner. “There’s only a few of his species left, some work here, not necessarily as slaves per say, so maybe he’s not? Maybe he works as a servant and that guy is just a horrible boss.” 

“We can’t interfere, can we?” Ryan asked. 

“Not with this, no,” the Doctor sighed. She looked down and kicked the dirt, seemingly frustrated, and then noticed the four cards in her hands. “Oh! Right, these,” she held them up, “are like credit cards, just made from graphite. Strong graphite though. You just put it on the table of the store or stall for five seconds and it will pay for whatever item is being taken out. I’ve tampered with it though, unlimited credits, so you don’t need to worry about spending.” 

“Where do you get this money from Doc?” Graham raised a brow, staring at the cards. 

She shrugged, “Just my hacking skillz, and yes, with a z.” 

They rolled their eyes. “So, are we wondering off?” Yaz questioned once she got handed a card. As soon as she touched it her initials appeared engraved into it, with a red colour. She looked at everyone else's. Ryan’s was yellow, the Doctor’s was blue, and Graham’s was green. And yes, the Doctor’s had ‘D.O.C.T.O.R’ on it. “That’s... Rather cool actually.” 

“It’s kind of like they imprint on you,” the blonde explained. “Now nobody else can use it, so there’s no stealing.” 

“That’s clever,” Graham examined his. “It won’t break, will it?” 

“No, it’s very strong graphite melded with silver.” 

“So, wandering off?” Yaz repeated as she pocketed her card in her jeans. 

“Well, if you want to. We can meet here in an hour?” the Doctor shrugged. 

“You’re going to talk to Runt, aren’t you?” Ryan nodded towards him walking off with his apparent owner or boss. 

“Maybe?” 

“Doc, you said we can’t interfe-” 

“Well Graham, maybe I won’t be interfering as such, maybe I just want to talk to him,” she crossed her arms, pouting. She then sighed. “I won’t be interfering okay? I’ll wander off like you guys...” 

“In the direction of Runt,” Yaz smirked. 

The Doctor had already been walking backwards, she feigned innocence. “Hmm?” 

They all laughed. “Just go,” Yaz waved her hand. “Meet here in an hour yeah?” 

“Yup!” the blonde grinned and sprinted off towards Runt. 

The fam just shared a look, and then groaned in unison at the Doctor’s lack of not interfering with historical events, on Earth or otherwise. Graham put his card in his coat pocket, patted it in case it had somehow slipped out, and then took a step forward to turn to his Grandson and friend. “Do you guys want to stick together or split up?” 

“Um,” Ryan glanced at Yaz, seeing the uncertain look in her eye as she looked past the elder to see the blonde talking to Runt and the blue alien. “Maybe split? No offence Yaz, but we don’t like the same things.” 

Sensing what he was getting at when he nodded ever so slightly towards the Doctor, Graham smirked. “Well that’s good. Maybe I could keep an eye on you so you don’t trip over someone.” 

Yaz giggled slightly at that, yet didn’t understand what Ryan was implying when she said they didn’t like the same thing, too focused on the Doctor and Runt to see his head tilt at them. “Okay, so we meet back here in an hour? And since Ryan is so bad and keeping track of time,” she nudged him, earning an eyeroll and an exasperated sigh. “Maybe I’ll text you when it’s up in case you’re not here.” 

“What if the Docs not here?” Graham raised a brow, crossing his arms. 

“Hmm,” she frowned, clearly hadn’t thought of the most possible thing. “If she has the mobile I gave her, I’ll text her.” 

“You gave her a mobile?” Ryan asked, smirk plastered on his face. 

“Oh, shut up,” she nudged him again. “It was just a precaution... And so she wouldn’t pop up at my house at stupid hours in the morning...” 

Ryan mouthed a ‘wow’ at Graham before he joined his side. “Well, an hour yeah? Get her something nice maybe?” 

“Or something for the picnic?” Graham prompted. 

“Or both?” 

“Go before I put you in a headlock,” she growled, yet a tad bit flustered at what they were insinuating. 

The boys just laughed before waving her off and heading towards the market. They walked past the Doctor and nodded at her, but she was too deep into a conversation with Runt’s apparent owner to notice. Yaz sighed once she saw that. She looked to the left of the market, noticing the number of tailored items, and thought that was the best place to start. Who knows? She might just find something for the blonde, after all, she needs a way to thank her to taking them to such a wonderful planet. 


	2. An Hour Later

The Doctor had talked to Runt and his owner, Lat. He was rather arrogant and abrasive, especially towards the Nuhal. They had gotten into a small argument over Runt’s wellbeing, mainly regarding the bandages wrapped around his arm. It didn’t go anywhere. There was no getting to Lat, his views made up and not wavering about how to treat anyone. She felt bad for Runt, and even worst when her argument seemed to make the owner want to be violent towards the Nuhal, blaming him for the Doctor interfering. 

She apologized to them, especially Runt when Lat stormed off. He apologized for his behavior, which wasn’t needed, but she accepted it anyway. Before Lat called him in by his numbers the Doctor gave Runt a sweet for lessening pain that would last a human year. Bashfully, he took it and thanked her again. It hurt that any kindness made him almost embarrassed, as if he was unsure of how to take a compliment. 

They bid farewell, and the Doctor looked around, finding her friends had already dispersed. She noticed Ryan and Graham wandering to a food stall, and saw what looked like Yaz looking at jewelry. She was going to join her, but remembered her persistent wondering whether they were going to split up. Maybe she wanted to be alone?  

Feeling a little bit crestfallen at that, the Doctor shrugged and headed off to the sweet stall. She had always been good at suppressing her emotions, why stop now? 

“Hello there,” a green cactus like woman smiled at her. “How may I help today?” 

“Ah, Vinvocci yeah?” 

“Correct,” she grinned, looking pleased if not rather stunned at her getting the species right. “Not many people are.” 

“Two of your people helped me and a friend out once,” the blonde smiled. “So, what sweets do you have? Any human safe ones?” 

“You’re human?” 

“No, I came here with friends,” she explained as she looked at the array of sweets. Some chocolate looking ones, ones shaped like fish, some liquid, hard candy, glass, gel goop. 

“Where are they?” the Vinvocci asked as she looked around, any hints of humans around. “You look human.” 

“Around,” the Doctor shrugged. “Let them wonder off-” 

Someone bumped into her, making her stumble into the stall. “Oh sorry!” 

She turned around to see a cat like girl in front of her, wearing something that could pass as a bikini yet also looked like she just had shoved a blanket over her. Her ears flicked down; black tail dropped down between her legs. 

“Oh uh, no harm done,” she smiled down at her. “Just look where you’re going yeah?” 

“Yeah,” she blushed slightly once she looked up at the blonde, the tint of pink evident on her very pale skin. “Wow, you’re pretty uh, Miss...?” 

“Doctor’s fine, and uh, thanks.” 

“Doctor?” her ears perked up. “I’ve heard that before.” 

“Probably,” she shrugged. “I’ve been around.” 

“Wish I could travel,” the girl pouted slightly, and then shook her head. “S-Sorry, uh, thanks for not getting mad but I’ve got to go. And uh, sorry again for bumping into you, I’ll look where I’m going now.” 

“It’s okay,” the blonde laughed as the girl ran off. She turned back to the stall owner, smiling up at her. “Sorry about that.” 

“No problem, she’s always doing that,” she waved her hand dismissively. 

“Oh, she’s local?” 

“Well, when markets are on, she’s here a lot, quite the clumsy child.” 

“When she’s not?” 

“She’s around sometimes,” the Vinvocci glanced over at the girl rushing through the crowds. “You might want to check your pockets.” 

Frowning, she did so. Screwdriver? Check. Credit? Check. Soil? Check. Jelly Babies? Check. Grass? What the? Shaking her head at the confusion, she looked back up at the owner with a smile. “Yup, everything’s there.” 

“Good,” she nodded, and gestured to the array of candy. “Anything catches your eye?” 

“What are those?” her nose scrunched up as she leant over and pointed to the mushed up green stuff. 

“Human terms,” she cocked her head to the side as she thought. “Kiwi tasting gummy bears turned to slush.” 

“Hmm. Is it able to be saved for later?” 

“Yeah, I can do take out,” she motioned to the small cardboard boxes stacked up on the edge of the stall. “Do you want that?” 

“Maybe, pretty sure Ryan likes kiwi,” the blonde muttered. “Any others?” 

“Kiwi flavored or?” 

“Oh no, just any human safe ones.” 

“There’s Gainut pasted chocolate? Um, I guess in human terms walnuts covered in chocolate, kinda crunchy.” 

“Okay, anything else?” 

“Peppermint pills? But they have a bit of strawberry laced in them, they’re like mints, I guess? But you to suck on them, not bite.” 

“They seem cool,” the Doctor grabbed her card. “I’ll take three of each, and a few Diato crunches.” 

“They’re for you I take it,” the Vinvocci smirked as she grabbed four boxes. “Do you want a bag?” 

“Um, no need,” she gestured to her pockets. “Bigger on the inside.” 

“Cool,” the stall owner smiled as she put everything in the boxes, sealed shut by clear tape. “That’d be 32 Credits.”

The Doctor placed the card on the small metal part of the stall, putting it back in her pocket when the blue of her card glowed. Smiling, the owner gave her the four boxes and they said their goodbyes. 

She only had half an hour left and didn’t really want anything, they could come back tomorrow or look around later. Instead of wandering too far, she stuck around the area closest to the meeting area, hoping to be more punctual than she had been lately, or ever. When she saw Graham and Ryan head over, she decided to join them. 

“Hey guys!” she wrapped her arms over each of their shoulders. “Have a good time?” 

“This alien market’s pretty cool Doc,” Graham smiled at her, gesturing to their four shopping bags. “They have stuff safe for humans too, still a bit unsettling they have stuff that could harm us, but best to look on the brighter side ‘ey?” 

“Yes Graham, it’s always best,” she grinned. “Oh! Speaking of human safe things, I got you guys some sweets!” 

“Really?” Ryan perked up, assumingly tired from the amount of walking they did. “I didn’t see any.” 

“Yeah, the one with the Vinvocci,” she pointed at the stall before stopping at the deemed meet up place. 

“The cactus?” 

“That’s racist Ryan, she’s a Vinvocci. Really nice too, she told me all the human safe ones. Oh, do you like kiwi?” 

“Yes, why?” 

“’Cause I got you some... Uh,” the Doctor reached into her pocket, grabbing three of the four boxes. “Apparently they taste like gummy bears.” 

“Oh, thanks,” he smiled as he got handed the green cardboard box. 

“And you some er, walnutty chocolates,” she gave the pale brown box to Graham. 

“You sure they’re walnuts?” 

“Well, they’re Gainuts, but they taste like walnuts...” 

“Well, thank you Doc,” he grinned, clearly sincere. “That’s very kind of you. Maybe we could save them for the picnic?” 

“That’s a good idea,” she agreed, bouncing on the spot. “I’m really excited!” 

“Clearly,” Graham laughed. “What’cha get Yaz?” 

“Oh, I got her these peppermint strawberry things, I hope she likes them...” 

“She will,” Ryan assured her with a nudge. “Speaking of, shouldn’t she be here by now? We were running late.” 

“Actually, yeah. It’s very unlike her to be late,” Graham said as he looked around. “Maybe she went to the TARDIS?” 

The Doctor pocketed the pink box and looked around, worry evident in her features. “I-I’ll go check; you guys stay here.” 

“You sure?” Ryan asked. 

“Yeah,” she forced a smile as she ran down the bank to the blue box. Luckily, with her sprinting it didn’t take nearly as long as she thought. She was just panicking. Yaz was fine. She can look after herself. She was probably late because of a queue, that’s all. Skidding into the TARDIS, the Doctor twirled around, looking for any sign that Yaz had been there. “Has she girl?” 

Before the TARDIS could answer a blaring siren was heard, a holographic screen appeared at the side of the console. There was static for a few moments. The Doctor flipped a switch and the noise stopped, the screen becoming a bit of a blur rather than static. Eventually, it tuned in and a dark-haired woman appeared. 

“Hello.” 


	3. Mya

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Blood warning!
> 
> Also a lot of hurt/comfort and Graham being the awesome Grandad he is.

“Hello.” 

“What?” The Doctor looked up at the hologram screen, confused. She pressed a blue button that made the siren noise disappear, and then turned her full attention to the screen. “Huh, didn’t know she could do that...” 

“Your precious TARDIS didn’t do this Doctor, I’ve got magic of my own,” the woman smirked as she looked over the blonde. “New regeneration... Hmm, well, I hope you remember me.” 

“Should I?” 

Her face fell. “Fine. If you really don’t remember me,” she reached to side, off screen, seemingly grabbing something. Moments later she pulled an exhausted, disheveled looking human on the screen. “I guess there’s no use for your friend.” 

“Yaz!”  

“D-Doctor!” 

“Tell me you remember me, or I’ll just kill her,” the woman said as she had a tight grasp on Yaz’s hair. 

“Mya, of course I remember you,” she scowled, her voice darker. “And what I did to your sister.” 

“Great,” Mya grinned, letting go of her friend’s hair. “S’pose your friend won’t die... Yet.” 

“Don’t you dare hurt her!” the Doctor growled as she twisted a few buttons on the console. 

“You can’t track me Doctor,” she smirked. “I’ve made sure of that. You’ll see your friend soon th- Well, soon for you maybe. Let me guess, it’s only been an a few minutes or so for you?” 

The ‘for you’ made the Doctor’s hearts sink. She looked at Yaz and noticed her disheveled state. She kept flinching whenever Mya would move or even look at her. Sighing, she glared up at the villainess, “Yeah, ‘bouts that. What about you?” 

“It’s been,” she paused, smirking down at the brunette. “Oh, how long Yaz?” 

Yaz stayed silent as she stared down at her feet, for some reason not looking directly at the Doctor. She gulped when Mya placed a hand on her shoulder, urging her to talk, so she did, however timidly. “F-Four months...” 

The Doctor froze. Her hearts hammered in her chest. She could just about hear Mya’s chuckle in an echo, barely reaching her ears as she tried to come up with a plan to undo all of this. Yaz was her friend and she let her down. Brave, talented, amazing Yaz, somewhat stood before her flinching at any noise, hunched over, not daring to look up. The sight made the blonde feel sick, and guilty. In an attempt to keep down her anger, for all of their sakes, she moved her hands and ran to the console, deciding to finally attempt to track down the signal. 

“You know you can’t pick her up earlier, even if you could find us, it would be a paradox,” Mya shrugged. “She’s gotten pretty good at following orders, haven’t you pet?” 

She stroked her hair again, making Yaz flinch away. All she did was nod. The Doctor could have sworn she heard a gulp and a small whimper escape her. As she tried to pin point their location – something that wasn’t working in the slightest for some unknown reason. 

“I swear if you-” 

“Gotta go, bye Doctor,” she grinned, letting go of Yaz’s hair. Her voice was almost professional, yet the Doctor feared what she was going to say next. “It’s time for another one of Yaz’s daily tortur-”  

“Mya!” she snapped, knowing how that sentence would end yet not wanting to hear it. 

Suddenly, Yaz clutched at her head and screamed out in agony. Her hands tangled into her hair, almost tugging at it, tears in her eyes threatening to spill. The Doctor could have sworn she heard her voice choke out a sob amongst the screaming. The pain tugged at her hearts, as if it was a warning sign they were going to break at any given moment. 

“Yaz!” 

“Bye Doctor!” 

“He-” the hologram message ended. “She hung up on me...” 

“Doc?” Graham asked cautiously by the door. She looked over at him, seeing Ryan standing meekly behind him. How long had they been there? How much had they seen?  

“Please go to your rooms,” she asked as calmly as she could as she clenched her fists against the metal of the console.  

“Doctor-” 

“Just go!” 

Without another word, the boys nodded and headed to their rooms. Once she knew she was alone she sighed, resting all of her weight on the console, trying to think of a plan. Unfortunately, Mya was right, she couldn’t go back and save Yaz before the conversation, it would create a paradox. She stayed silent, working through scenarios in her head. There were a few moments of her calculating every possibility before finally hitting the edge of the console with a frustrated groan. 

“Why? Why did I have to leave her? Be so reckless,” she growled, tears forming in her eyes. “I knew that girl looked familiar, why couldn’t... Ugh.” 

She kicked at the console and paced around it, muttering all the outcomes to herself. None of them were good. The only one that seemed possible was finding her now and hoping whatever torment Mya had set on her wasn’t too damaging, or had any long-lasting mental effects. She knew Mya’s kind, and how she was. Unfortunately, she knew she leant more towards psychological torture rather than physical. 

The Doctor punched the console, anger overtaking her as she continued her assault on the TARDIS, sparks flying everywhere. She didn’t care at that point. She didn’t care that she might have been bleeding by now by scratching herself on switches at every hit. She didn’t care that she was taking out her anger and frustration on her TARDIS. She didn’t care about any repercussions of her actions at that moment for the worst she could have thought of happening today had happened. Yaz had been taken. She had been kidnapped whilst in her care. The thought of something even more terrible happening to her had crossed her mind one too many times. The thought of having to explain to her parents... 

She couldn’t even finish the thought. It was too much. Tears clouded her vision and anger her judgement as she continued to batter the console. She stopped once she saw a flash of red, suddenly feeling cool liquid on the controls and her hands. The pain slowly came through then, a burning sensation ran through her palms and fingers tips as she saw parts her skin had ripped apart during the assault. Dark droplets of blood dripped onto the console, most of it smeared all over her fragile burning skin. 

“Doc?” 

The blonde turned around to see Graham cautiously approaching her. He sucked in a breath once he saw her battered hands, and rushed over to her. 

“Bloody hell Doc,” he whispered as he looked over the console and the rest of her body, seemingly assessing the situation. “W-What did you do?” 

The shock yet softness of his voice made her break. She burst out crying, her hands curled up to her chest shaking uncontrollably. Leaning into him slightly, trying not to put her whole weight on him, she quietly sobbed.  

“G-Graham I... It’s m-my fault...” 

He gently wrapped an arm around her, the other hovering under her blood covered hands. “Hey,” he hushed soothingly. “It’ll be okay, we’ll get her back okay? You couldn’t have known this would happen.” 

“I... D-Duty of care,” she muttered out, struggling to breathe. Luckily, she didn’t need to breathe like humans, so that was the least of her concern at the moment. Her main concern was how to save Yaz, and how to make it up to Graham for him seeing her like this. “S-Sorry...” 

“Doc,” he hushed out as he rubbed her shoulder comfortingly, and gently placed his hand on her still bleeding hands, some of it dripping onto him. She hissed at the pain. By the amount of blood it was clear something hit a vein or two, wherever that was on her hand was still a mystery to them. It didn’t matter anyway, at least, not to her. “Let’s get your hands looked at yeah? Then we’ll find Yaz, okay?” 

“Y-You didn’t see her...” 

“I saw enough to know that she needs us,” he protested, yet his voice was still soft. “But right now, you need to look after your hands.” 

She shook her head and leant into him, crying calming down. “No, w-we need to find her-” 

“And we will, but first your hands.” 

Sighing, knowing she’d get nowhere with him, she nodded and followed him to the medical bay, stumbling into him as her feet dragged on the floor.  


	4. I'd Like To Find Out

She was shopping. There was a blue Nuhal, who was kind like Runt, but only went by his numbers, 392, tending the stall. He was nice too, despite only making a limited amount of small talk until he got back to business. Yaz felt a tap on her shoulder once she bought the crystal she had been looking at for a while, unsure of whether to buy it. She turned to see a tall dark-haired woman, who kept her hand on her shoulder. 

“Yasmin?” 

“Um, yes?” she replied hesitantly, looking the taller woman up and down. Luckily, there were no weapons, and no wandering hands to steal anything. How did she know her name? 

“Great!” the woman smiled. 

Yaz remembered getting tired, and leaning on the woman as they walked away from the stall. She caught a glimpse of red, noticing it was most likely Runt or a look-a-like. She breathed in the scent of mint, and looked at the woman holding her, a small smirk on her face. 

“I-I’m sorry,” she drawled, her eyes closing before she even noticed. “But, w-who are... You...?” 

The next thing she remembered was waking up chained to a bed. Well, bed was new. Usually when she was captured it was the floor, or a metal slab. It was a nice change, however alarming. She tested the strength of the metal holding her to the bed, yelping when it sent a small electric shock to her arm. 

“What the?” 

She looked around, surprised that the lights were there and dimmed, again, she’s usually left in darkness. The sheets were a dark purple, and satin, the bed frame black. It actually looked good, but unsettled her as she took in her surroundings. Unsurprisingly, there was no windows. There was a door though, not like she could get to it. It was black along with the overall scheme of the room, besides a few deep purple objects that tied with the bed. 

Yaz sighed, annoyed that she got herself in this mess. Yet the main thing that was on her mind was if the Doctor was safe, knowing how her species are sometimes hunted for a bounty – it happened once to her, but the hunter was thrown in a supernova by the TARDIS, so it was all fine in the end. 

The door opening caught her attention, distracting her from her thoughts. Black hair. That was the first thing she saw. Then a face peered around it, eyes going wide in glee before the person stepped in. 

“Oh good, you’re awake!” she skipped over and sat down on the bed next to her. “I was afraid I overdosed you.” 

Yaz noticed her skin was extremely pale, her hair almost completely masking it. Her bright blue eyes were cat-like, and she wore barely any clothing. “Um... W-Who are you?” 

“I’m Lilah,” she smiled. “Mya should be here soon, she’s the one that bought you here.” 

“B-But you just said you were worried you overdosed me,” Yaz couldn’t help the shiver that run down her spine. The thought of accidentally being overdosed by God knows what on an alien planet was not what how she wanted to die. Not that she thought much about dying, or knew how she wanted to, she just knew it would be hard for someone to explain to her family. 

“Yeah, I’m the one that stuck the needle in you, Mya’s the one that made sure you didn’t collapse to the ground,” Lilah saw the chain tied to her wrist. “Hmm, she really doesn’t want you to escape huh?” 

“Seems not,” Yaz tugged at the chain only to receive a milder shock that went up to her shoulder. “Ow! Why did it-” 

“Lilah.” 

The woman from before stood by the door, arms crossed, hair loosely tied back. She looked between the two teens; her face unreadable. Lilah straightened up, visibly tense. “Yes?” 

“I thought I told you not to interact with her,” she scowled, gesturing to the captive girl on the bed. 

“Well, I wanted to check I didn’t overdose her-” 

“You shouldn’t be concerned about her Lilah.” 

“Y-Yes Mya,” the teen looked down slightly, clearly intimidated by her. Who was she? Why was Lilah scared by her if they worked together? 

Mya smirked and unfolded her arms. She looked over at Yaz, her smirk turning into a frown. “You’re awake then. Pity.” 

“You wanted me-” 

“No, but I would have preferred it,” she sighed. “I guess torturing you will make the Doctor break.” 

“The Doctor?” Yaz tugged at the chain, a mild electric shock reaching up to her shoulder making her stop and yelp. “W-What has she got to do with this?” 

“Everything,” her voice darkened, if that was even possible. It made the two girls flinch. Her glare was frightening, Yaz couldn’t bring herself to look her in the eye. 

“Yeah,” Lilah spoke up after a bit of silence, rather timidly. She smiled at the officer. “Basically, there’s a bit of-” 

She stopped once she heard heels click on the floor, the woman – seemingly known as Mya – walked up to her and smacked her over the head. Yaz flinched at the sound, and heard a yelp come from Lilah. Mya growled, almost animalistic, at the teen, and strolled over to the other side of the bed where the companion sat. She stood there, looking over her. The silence was uncomfortable, all Yaz wanted to do was speak, or urge Mya to speak so something could happen. Yet feared getting beaten up, seeing as her captor seemed to not care about her wellbeing at all, unlike Lilah. They stared at each other, occasionally losing eye contact due to how intimidating the woman’s glare was, until, finally, she spoke. 

“I’ve always wondered how a human’s mind works,” she towered over Yaz, a smirk fell on her lips as she looked at her up and down. “I’d like to find out.”

* * *

 

After that Yaz was the source of any experiment Mya had planned. Each one more daunting than the last. She would be locked in complete darkness for God knows how long, sometimes there’d be constant noise, other times silence. It was harrowing. Sometimes she was thrown into a freezer, apparently to see how long until the human body would take to freeze to near death. Once or twice she was dragged into a shower, either to almost drown her or to scold her with boiling hot water. 

Fortunately, they had a device that heals any physical injury. Unfortunately, it meant they could beat her black and blue over and over without any repercussions. It seemed Mya favoured wrecking the human’s mind rather than her body. Yaz remembered that every time she was dragged out of that room. 

Any time Yaz would protest, even slightly, her head would hurt and she’d collapse to the floor, screaming. Mya had this technique, as she called it, that could create immense pain in someone’s head whenever she pleased. It was awful. 

All of her ideas were dreadful, agonizing, and downright terrifying. However, there was one in particular that had a lasting effect on Yaz after her first time being under the torture, and not just being afraid of the dark or having nightmares. 

Yaz was strapped down to a metal chair, the leather straps dug into her skin leaving marks that lasted for a few days. She was blindfolded, the dimly lit room turned to darkness. Mya had another trick, and it was to take away her senses. Everything but touch at least. It felt unsettling not being able to hear, smell, or see anything. Yaz wasn’t even sure she could speak, given she couldn’t hear her voice, not that she said much.  

She lost track of time when she was in that room. It didn’t matter how long she was there anyway. Unable to move, see, hear, or possibly even speak. It was terrifying. The worst part of it was the touching. Occasionally she’d be lightly touched on the leg, thigh, arm, face, sometimes even the stomach. Mya mainly focused on her legs and arms though, for some unknown reason. It started out as light touches, but as time went on, they became more aggressive. She’d be poked, pinched, and sometimes slapped at random intervals. There’d be at least an hour before the next assault began, or sometimes only a few seconds. 

When she was let back into her room she would still feel as if someone was touching her arms lightly, and sometimes knee. The feeling was rather unsettling, to say the least. She would trace her hand over wherever she felt it, and then scratch at her skin to knowingly feel something. Mya would laugh at her for that, and sometimes lock her hands to the bedpost above her head, just to antagonize her further, leave the itch that she could not scratch to torment her until the next day. Until the next set of tortures. 

During every ‘session’ she blamed the Doctor for what her prisoner was going through, and made sure Yaz knew it. 


	5. Right Amount of Damage

The Doctor was gone. The agonizing pain in Yaz’s head had subsided. She was on the floor, Mya towering over her, smirk plastered on her face. If it wasn’t for the dull ache in her knees from the impact of hitting the floor, she thought she had been cut off from her senses again since the screen had cut so suddenly, leaving silence to linger in the room. That smirk on Mya’s face always made her cautious, it only happened if she was doing something to her, sometimes whatever it was wouldn’t be noticed until after. Before she knew it, Lilah was at her side helping her up.

“T-Thanks,” she muttered.

Lilah merely flashed her a grin before turning to the older woman. “What do we do now?”

“See if the Doctor turns up, I suppose,” she shrugged. “Meanwhile, set her up in room three.”

 “Um...”

“Spit it out,” Mya groaned with a roll of the eyes, sensing Lilah’s apprehension.

“Could she uh,  rest for a bit? I mean, w-we don’t want her too damaged, right?”

“We want her just the right amount of damaged for when the Doctor finds her,” she growled.

Yaz dreaded to think of what ‘the right amount of damaged’ could mean. She couldn’t even look at Mya in the eyes without fear of being reprimanded, no matter how much she wanted to. Lilah grabbed onto her forearm and dragged her along the hallway. It made her anxious every time she walked down here. Each door had a different set of tortures waiting to be used behind them. Yaz knew of room three, but couldn’t place what happened in there for her to mentally prepare herself. Room four was burning, room sixteen was the sensory deprivation, room five was freezing and drowning, and room twelve was the psychological torture. That one changed every time. Room three though, she couldn’t place, and that just made her even more scared at what horror could await her.

As soon as they entered the  room she got pushed into the centre of it, not given a chance to take in her surroundings. It was something she should have been used to by now.

“Sit down,” Lilah ordered as she gestured to the chair behind the human. She looked over it, trying to figure out what was going to happen. The chair looked relatively normal, like a dentist one except without the side table and straps on the arms. “Now Yasmin.”

“R-Right,” she muttered as she gulped. The dentist was never her most comfortable experiences, and the fact that she had to sit in a chair like one brought back the memories of her childhood nerves of going to the dentist, except this experience she knew would be worse than a regular check-up or filling. Her fear and anxiety came back in an instant as she climbed into the chair, shifting in it to make herself a tad bit more comfortable. She didn’t know how long she was going to be there after all.

“Lilah you can leave,” Mya said once she entered the room. “Miss Khan and I will be out in an hour. Maybe more.”

“Okay-”

“Make sure to get everything ready,” she glanced at her before stalking over to Yaz and looking over her. “Remember to prepare this one after this experiment. Maybe get her room ready?”

Prepare? Yaz had a sinking feeling as she tried to figure out what she meant. She desperately wanted to question it, but knew her torture here would only last longer if she dared speak. She learnt early on not to speak to her unless spoken to, no matter how hard it was.

“Yeah, I’ll get on that,” Lilah nodded before she left, closing the door on her way out. Luckily, unlike the other rooms, this one had a window, so there was at least some light coming into it for the human to see.

“So, Yaz,” Mya started as she walked over to a small control box. “With this experiment communication is key, so you can talk whenever and however you want. In fact, right now you can tell me off for everything I’ve done to you. If you want that is.”

Yaz stayed silent, but shuffled to move up in the chair, resting her head comfortably on the makeshift pillow like wedge.

Mya smirked with a small laugh. “Smart. But seriously, this hour is your chance. I might up the torture, but I’d do that when I get bored anyway, your words – no matter how harsh – will not count towards how much this will be.”

She groaned at herself, her curiosity and trepidation getting the best of her. “W-What is this experiment?”

“I’m sure you can figure it out, but it does include a blindfold,” she said as she held one up.

“D-Deprivation?”

“Not exactly,” Mya shrugged and walked over to Yaz. She delicately placed the blindfold on the human’s chest before roughly grabbing her arms and tying them to the arms of the chair. “Care to venture another guess?”

“Juxtapositions?” she muttered, as if she were talking to herself rather than anyone.

“Clever, and kind of close, but no.”

“What do you mean by ‘prepare me’?” Yaz winced once she realized what she had just asked. She wasn’t going to speak, but her lingering thoughts of what that meant had been vocalized before she could stop it.

Mya chuckled. It was the type of one that sent a shiver down the human’s spine. Her proximity to the woman made it worst. “Thought you might ask that. A few of my friends haven’t seen your kind before. They’re coming over to see you, like a gathering if you will. A little catch up. As well as being a source of entertainment, you’re also going to serve them.”

She didn’t like how she said ‘serve them’, like there was a hidden meaning. “W-What do you me-”

A finger pressed against her lips, and Mya made eye contact as she shushed her, a smirk plastered on her face. “That’s enough questions for now.”

Yaz just blinked, staring at her blankly. Mya removed her hand from her lips and slowly dragged her hand from her neck to the blindfold, tracing lightly along her skin. The feeling lingered on her body, and she squirmed, wanting to press her hand on herself to ease the uncomfortable sensation. It was like an itch she couldn’t scratch. Suddenly, the woman snatched the blindfold from her chest, making Yaz jump at the sudden movement, distracting her from her thoughts.

“Relax Yasmin,” Mya chuckled as she placed the blindfold on the human and stepped away. She could only assume she was admiring her work. “Breathe in deeply for me.”

Not seeing any point in resisting, and now a bit more anxious by her lack of sight, Yaz did so. The moment she exhaled she felt a tap on her leg.

“Your leg is twitching.”

“’Course it is,” she spat, suddenly annoyed at the accusation. “You’re poking it.”

“Getting your bark back huh?” she could practically feel the mischievous smirk plastered on her face. “And no, I’m not.”

“Y-Yes you are.”

“I can assure you I’m not,” the woman giggled slightly. “Well, that is amusing.”

Her leg twitched again once it was poked. “Y-You are!”

She winced when the blindfold was removed, blinking a few times from the sudden light. Mya stood a few inches away from her, a sly smile on her face. “I’m not lying Yasmin,” she waved her hand in a circle, revealing what seemed like a projection that appeared in front of her. “See?”

It was a recording clip of what just happened. A few seconds of the blindfold being on her, her leg jutted. Mya was right, she wasn’t near her. She merely stood and stared; amusement evident on her features when Yaz claimed she had been touched.

“W-What...”

“Good to see the deprivation is working,” Mya grinned. “Should do that more often, maybe it would be a permanent side effect.”

“P-Please don’t,” Yaz pleaded, tugging against her bonds.

“Oh honey,” she smirked as she held onto her face, forcing the companion to stay still. “You begging won’t work here. In fact, it’s an incentive for me to do the opposite. You should know that by now.”


	6. Teleportation can be tricky

Hours after that experiment Yaz still couldn’t figure out what had happened, what the point of it was, what it even was. She could only remember parts of it, parts where she wasn’t blindfolded. Was it memory? She shook her head, not wanting to figure out what she went through. It gave her a headache just thinking about it. 

She lay on the bed, curled up, this time with nothing holding her down. It was odd, not having something tying her arm to the headboard. What was even stranger, and frankly, terrifying, is that she almost felt uncomfortable without it. She had gotten used to sleeping with restraints. It was unsettling to say the least. 

“Are you okay?” Lilah asked quietly as she sat down on the bed. 

“F-Feel weird,” Yaz murmured, her voice muffled by the pillow. She squirmed a little before begrudgingly turning her head to face the girl, noticing her ears and tail were drooped down. “W-What’s up?” 

“I need to prepare you... But I don’t...” 

“You don’t?” 

“Really want to? And,” she paused, shifting uncomfortably as she glanced at the door, and then turned back to the human. “I think I know how to get you out of here... B-But it is risky...” 

Yaz sat up, suddenly interested in what she had to say. “R-Risky how?” 

“If we get caught... I’d say an agonizing slow death, for both of us...” 

As much as she wanted to escape, Lilah had been nice for her since the beginning, and didn’t want to think about what she would go through if she had managed to leave. “H-How would it.... Go?” 

“Well,” Lilah shuffled closer to her. “I’m sure you – who am I kidding, I’ve seen you look at it when we go out – the teleportation thing-” 

“Teleportation?” Yaz looked confused. “When have I looked at that? W-Where is that?” 

“You don’t rememb – okay,” she sighed, looking slightly worried. “Okay, well there is. I know how to use it. I can probably try to set it to earth, you can get home then. I can go back to the market, see if I can find your friends sooner.” 

“T-That wouldn’t work,” she shook her head. “I’m sure there’s s-some rule about paradoxes... I can’t quite remember what she told me...” 

“She is?” 

Yaz shook her head, she couldn’t even bring herself to say it. “Y-You know who I mean.” 

“Wow,” Lilah looked away, her ears drooped. “I remember when you’d talk about how wonderful she is for hours.” 

“Y-Yeah well, things change,” the human shrugged. “So… this teleport?” 

“You’re a bit weak… I could come with you back to Earth? Would they say anything about my ears and tail?” 

“Yes, t-they would,” Yaz shuffled up to her and glanced up at the door quickly before looking back at her. “Where are you going to go?” 

“I’ll find somewhere,” Lilah shrugged. “Don’t worry about me.” 

“But-” 

“This is preparing her?” Mya stood by the door; her arms crossed. 

“S-Sorry, we were just talking,” Lilah bolted up off the bed and rushed to the human’s side and grabbed her arm. “Servant yeah?” 

“Yes,” the woman sighed as she headed for the door. “If you’re not ready in ten minutes I’ll send you both to room eight.” 

“U-Understood.” 

When Mya left Yaz released a breath she wasn’t aware she had been holding. “R-Room eight?” 

“You’ve be... You don’t want to know,” Lilah sighed as she let go of her arm. “Hmm. To go you need to be in... Something more than that.” 

Yaz looked down at herself, following Lilah’s gaze, to see a loosely fitted black vest top and what looked like blue pajama shorts. Where had these come from? She knew she didn’t own a pair of these. How long had she been wearing them? 

“These aren’t mine,” she said absentmindedly. 

“Yeah, you’ve been wearing them a while,” Lilah smiled slightly. “Mya thought it would be more practical than a dress or what you were originally wearing – Oh! You can wear them! They’ve gotta be in here somewhere...” 

Before Yaz could question what she meant, the cat girl scurried off to the far end of the room, raiding the cupboards. A moment later she bolted up with a pile of clothes in her arms, a triumphant grin plastered on her face. She jogged over to the confused human. 

“These look familiar?” 

She laid the clothes out. A brown leather jacket, a green t-shirt, and black jeans. “Y-Yeah... Looks more like me.” 

“Great!” Lilah beamed. “We have about eight minutes. Get dressed quickly and we’ll get going.” 

“W-We’re going now?” Yaz asked, stunned at the limited time. “What if we get caught?” 

“If you shut up and get dressed, we’ll be fine,” Lilah said as she shoved the jeans to her. “Sheffield yeah? That’s where you said you came from?” 

“Y-Yeah,” she nodded as she got changed. It was rather hard since she was trembling, and the limited time frame looming over her head got her distracted. She didn’t really understand why she was shaking, and that frustrated her more out of anything. 

“Okay, I’ll try to get you as close as I can to the police station there,” Lilah said as she handed the human her top, helping her into it. She shoved the jacket into her hands next, and as she put it on, she helped zip up her jeans that she was struggling with. “You said you worked there? They should know what to do with you.” 

Yaz bit her lip, nervous about randomly appearing at the police station after four months. “Y-Yeah... Um... Do you have a uh, a date and time I could arrive at home?” 

“I can get you there when you left with... her, if you remember?” 

“Um,” she hummed as she shoved her jacket on. “I t-think it was... Um, fifteenth of October?” 

“Okay, I’ll try my best to get you there,” Lilah grinned. “Now c’mon, we have five minutes left!” 

She grabbed her hand and dragged her out of the room. It felt weird. Running along the halls rather than steadily walking. Even seeing some of the rooms made her shudder, despite knowing she wasn’t going to be in them anymore. It was odd, knowing she was finally going to be free, but she still felt anxious about it. What if Mya knew what they had – however quickly – planed, and followed her home? Or stopped them just as they got to the teleport? What tortures would await them if they got caught? 

“Here,” Lilah whispered as she stopped just outside what looked like a small grey monument, almost like a birdbath with no water. “Think of Sheffield yeah?” 

Yaz gulped and nodded before she got dragged in front of it, her back pressed against the metal. She looked to her side when Lilah grabbed what looked like a remote and typed the co-ordinates down. 

“Say something so I know you’re with me kiddo.” 

Confused by the sudden use of ‘kiddo’ she tilted her head. “W-Why are you-” 

“Oh good,” she snapped her head up from looking at the remote. “You can kinda talk now. A bit raspy but yeah, at least humans will understand you. Not completely mute.” 

Mute? “W-What? I-I'm not mute, I’ve been talking to you-” 

“Oh, I’m telepathic... Did I not say?” Lilah tilted her head before waving her hand dismissively. “Eh, doesn’t matter now. Yeah, after that last experiment you went mute, you’re slowly getting your voice back. Actually, that’s happened quite a few times, once you were mute for a few days. I guess after this constant cycle of tortures you just weren’t aware since I was replying to you. Sorry.” 

“I-I...” 

“Lilah?!” Mya’s voice echoed through the halls. Fortunately, it sounded far away. 

“Time to go, be safe yeah?” Lilah grinned as she pressed the green button.  

Suddenly, blue covered Yaz’s vision and she felt lifeless. It was almost sickening how she lurched from the ground. A second later she slumped down onto concrete, blinded by the sudden sunlight hitting her face. She looked around hazily, feeling rather dizzy as her eyes finally focused and she saw where she was. Luckily, she noticed nobody was around to see her magically appear on the pavement. She slowly felt the concrete under her palms, grounding herself, making sure her mind knew she was back on Earth. Back home. Leaning against what felt like bars, she slowly turned to see she was leaning on a blue metal fence. Any quick movement made her feel motion sick. Slowly, she turned to face her front, looking at her surroundings. She saw a sign across the road on one of the houses, what looked like said ‘St. Georges Close’ with ‘51-61A’ above it. They were student flats. She must’ve been near the university, or one of its buildings. 

“Are you okay?” 

Yaz snapped her head up to the voice. For some reason she hoped it was Lilah, hoped she was okay. But it wasn’t. It was a girl, maybe around her age, wearing a hoodie, skinny jeans, and had a small rusk sack slung over one shoulder. She must’ve been a student, Yaz realized. She looked down at her, as if she was trying to figure something out. 

“Um,” Yaz managed to speak, now that she was aware that she had previously been mute. That had shaken her up. “I-I think? W-Where are we?” 

The girl crouched down, a curious look on her face. “Allen Court, student blocks. Sheffield? England? UK? Earth?” 

She kept getting more broader to see if anything clicked in Yaz’s head, luckily Sheffield did. “S-Sheffield yeah... T-Thanks.” 

“Do you want some water?” the girl asked as she swung her bag around to her front and opened it. She grabbed a half empty bottle of water from it and held it out to her. “You seem dehydrated.” 

“Uh,” Yaz wanted to laugh. She must have seemed out of it to the girl, probably hungover or just unstable. She licked her lips, noticing how dry and cracked they felt. Tentatively, she reached out for the drink. “T-Thanks.” 

“No problem,” the girl grinned kindly. “Um, I haven’t seen you around here before. You definitely weren’t here this morning.” 

Yaz gulped down most of the water as she spoke, not realizing how parched she actually was until the water ran down her throat. She paused for breath and nodded slightly. “J-Just uh... A-Appeared here I guess?” 

“You look familiar,” she said, not fazed by her vagueness by how she got there. “What’s your name?” 

“Y-Yasmin uh,” she froze momentarily, trying to remember her surname. Thankfully, it came to her, albeit slowly. “K-Khan, Yasmin Khan, yeah...” 

“That name sounds familiar too,” the girl hummed. “My flat’s just there, do you want to come into the warmth? I can phone someone whilst I look up something.” 

“Y-You’ll take me in just l-like that?” she looked up at her stunned. Thankful, but stunned. 

“You don’t really seem crazy, and I swear I’ve seen you before I just can’t place it,” the girl smiled and stood up, closing her bag before swinging back on her shoulder. “So, want to get out of the cold?” 

“Um, s-sure,” Yaz smiled up at her before slowly getting up. Despite trying not to get motion sick, she swayed and stumbled back into the fence when she stood up. The student grabbed onto her arm to steady her and picked up the water bottle. 

“Easy now,” she said gently as she held onto Yaz, slowly making their way across the empty road and to the building. She used her card to get into the block of flats and steadily walked up to the second floor into her room. “Bed or chair?” 

Yaz knew either could send her spiralling, but she didn’t have the strength to keep standing. On the plus side it was just a single bed with blue sheets, and what looked like a green argyle pattern at the bottom. The chair was a normal small computer one, yet it was too close to room sixteen. “B-Bed.” 

“Okay,” the girl gently put her down on the bed, closed the door, and sat at the desk, quickly going on her laptop covered in different stickers. “Make yourself comfortable, I just need to look something up.” 

“Um, t-thanks uh...” 

The student looked up, as if she had only realized. “Oh! Sorry, my name’s Sofia,” she extended her hand and shook Yaz’s. “Nice to meet you Yasmin.” 

“N-Nice to meet you too.” 

“You from Sheffield then?” 

“Y-Yeah,” she nodded. “W-Where are you from?” 

“Moved to Scotland three years ago,” Sofia shrugged as she typed away at her laptop. “But originally my family and I are from Brazil.” 

“You don’t h-have to travel as far to see your family then,” Yaz said as she took another sip of water from the bottle 

“Yeah, luckily,” she smiled and paused as she clicked on something. She looked over what seemed like an article before twirling around to face her. “Does working at the police station ring a bell?” 

Police station? Sheffield police station? Yaz snapped her head up as realisation dawned on her. “Y-Yeah, it does. Sorry, yeah. I’m a junior police officer at H-Hallamshire station... Sorry, long day... S-Seem to be forgetting stuff...” 

“It’s okay," Sofia laughed a little at her almost rambling. She then settled and cautiously grabbed Yaz’s hand, seemingly for comfort, before taking a deep breath. “Okay so, PC Khan, do you know that you’ve been missing for a month?”  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is going to end quicker than I thought now that I've taken stuff out - hence the chapter change - and I'm hopefully going to finish this soon before starting any new projects.


	7. Was Lost, Now Found

“A-A month?” Yaz stammered out. It was better than the four months she was originally away, she guessed. That didn’t help how guilty she felt. Her parents must have been scared for her, knowing her mother she had sleepless nights. It was out of her control, how long she had been gone, so she didn’t really know why she felt so bad. “H-How...”

“It’s all here,” Sofia said as she got her laptop and put it on the officer’s lap. Yaz flinched and moved her hands off her lap as she did, she cautiously looked at the monitor. She saw a picture of her for her work ID, a caption under it saying her age, full name, where she worked, and underneath all of that paragraphs on how long she had been missing, how her family had coped. Badly was an understatement.

“T-This,” she started, but got choked up. Before she knew it, tears were running down her face. She didn’t even know she could cry anymore, after the third month. Sofia, clearly  feeling sorry for her, sat next to her on the bed and cautiously wrapped her arm around her.

“Sorry, didn’t expect it to hit you this hard,” Sofia whispered as she rubbed the side of her arm comfortingly. “I can call the station for you? They’ll know how to contact your parents.”

Yaz merely nodded as she tried to calm herself down. As she wiped at her face her jacket rode up, and she noticed markings up her arms. There was one on her wrist that was deeper than the others, she guessed it was from the shackles she had to have on her when she slept and the others were from each experiment. She knew Sofia noticed them too, but she was considerate enough to not mention it, and she just went back to her chair.

“One second then,” she smiled sweetly as she picked up her mobile from the desk. “Yes, hello. Can I talk to the police...  Yup. Oh, hey. Um, this may sound weird but I have a Yasmin Khan here, I found her outside my – Oh, yes. Okay, yeah, ten St. Georges Close, Allen Court student – Yup. In 54 A. I can take her outs – Oh, okay, sure. I’ll wait outside then. Goodbye.”

“S-So...?”

“They’re on their way,” she grinned. “A Josh Pence and Ramesh Sunder are going to be here to check over you and I think they might question me?”

“S-Sorry, but yeah, they might. Since you found me and y-yeah...”

“It’s fine, as long as they don’t accuse me of kidnapping you,” Sofia shrugged as she peered through her window blinds. “Just have to wait for the sirens huh.”

“Y-Yeah,” Yaz nodded, pulling her jacket tightly around her. It was surreal. Waiting for her superior, her work friend, in someone’s student flat, not even knowing where Graham and Ryan were. Were they at home, worrying too? Did they know? Or were they still with... Her. 

Moments later sirens were heard and Sofia jumped up and headed to the door. “I’ll be right back!”

Yaz watched the door close, and as she turned to face her lap again, she noticed her reflection in the mirror above a small sink. She barely recognized herself. Her skin was paler than usual, she had black under her eyes, her lips were pale and cracked, she looked like she hadn’t eaten in weeks. But  of course, she had, right? She shook her head, knowing if Mya hadn’t fed her then Lilah would have. Why was remembering so hard?

The door opened, distracting the human from her frustration when two police officers walked in. Josh and Ramesh. Luckily, she remembered them. Josh sat down on the bed and looked over her. “Yaz?”

“Y-Yeah,” she smiled slightly. “W-Weird right?”

“We better get you down to the station,” Ramesh said. He looked concerned, but still tried to act professional.

“W-Where’s Sofia?” Yaz asked as she looked at the door, there was no sign of her.

“She’s going to be coming with us,” Josh smiled slightly. He shook his head when he saw Yaz’s concerned expression. “Not like that-”

“She’s agreed to come down and explain everything she knows in case you can’t explain things,” Ramesh explained. “According to her you seem to be having some memory loss?”

“Oh uh, y-yeah,” Yaz frowned, knowing she would mention the markings. Knowing that once they knew of any lasting damage, they’d want to take pictures for evidence, try to figure out what happened to her. They couldn’t find out. She knew this would be an unsolvable case. One that would probably keep her family up at night. Keep Josh and Ramesh up at night.

“Are you okay to move? Nothing hurts?” Josh asked as he stood up, slowly reaching out for her arm.

“N-Nothing hurts, no,” Yaz shook her head and stood up, a bit too fast and she got a head rush. Josh gently held onto her and they lead her downstairs. When she got outside, she saw three cop cars, Sofia in the front of one with Romero, the new- ish officer that she hadn’t gotten to know yet. In her condition, Yaz suspects she never will. She got in the front of the car with Josh. As soon as she did, he reminded her of her seatbelt. Begrudgingly, she slowly buckled up.

Once they got to the station, they wrapped Yaz in a beige fleece blanket and gave her apple juice and an apple, seeing as she looked dehydrated and hungry. It was nice having something sugary and something sweet whilst she anxiously awaited the arrival of her family. As she waited, she couldn’t stop thinking about Ryan and Graham, and if they got caught up in this. She hoped they didn’t.

“Um, Josh?” she called out as loud as she could. Luckily, he had just finished talking with Sofia and was just walking past.

“Yeah?” he stopped and looked over her. “Want some more juice?”

“No - well, I g-guess, b-but no, that’s not why,” she sighed, eyes squeezed shut as she collected her thoughts. “S-Sorry, sorry, just um-”

“Hey, it’s alright,” Josh said gently as he sat down next to her. “What was it you wanted to ask?”

“Uh, c-could you phone a Ryan Sinclair for me? H-He phoned earlier this year about something, so it should be in the system.”

“Do you want to talk to him yourself?”

“Y-Yeah actually, t-that might be better,” she smiled at them, and then turned to Sofia, who had been standing in front of her silently. “T-Thanks for helping me Sofia. D-Did everything go okay in there?”

“Yeah, everything was okay,” she grinned. “And it's no problem really, I’m just glad you’re okay now. I uh, better get going, need to meet people. I hope everything goes well with you and your family. Take care Yasmin.”

And with that, she was gone. “She doesn’t like police stations,” Josh clarified as he stood up. “I’ll get you that phone.”

“T-Thanks.”

Moments later Josh tossed her a mobile and another carton of apple juice. He gave her a quick smile before he left. She looked at the mobile and saw a number already typed out, all she had to do was dial. Taking a deep breath, she called Ryan, biting her lip as she brought the device to her ear.

“Hello?” he asked uncertainly, obviously not checked the caller ID before answering. She could hear the low hum of the TARDIS in the background.

“R-Ryan,” she smiled slightly, tearing up at hearing his voice after so long.

“Yaz?!”

“Y-Yup,” she nodded, gripping onto the phone like a lifeline. “I’m uh, I’m at the p-police station-”

“Oh, the Doc said she can track the signal, we’ll be there asap!”

“O-Okay,” she felt uneasy knowing she would be there, but she couldn’t blame them. It’s not like they knew. He hung up before she could say anything else and she heard the TARDIS  materialize outside. Thank God it was outside. She had no clue how to explain that to her work.

“Yaz!” she heard from the entrance. She didn’t even need to look up to know who it was. “Yaz! A-Are you... Oh...”

Ryan immediately sat by her side, whereas the Doctor and Graham stood in front of her. They all seemed shocked if their silence was anything to go by. The blonde crouched down in front of her and went to grab her hands but Yaz flinched away, and shook her head. It was almost like a reflex at this point.

“D-Don’t,” she muttered as she squeezed her eyes shut, shaking her head. 

“Doc, I think she needs her family,” Graham said softly as he placed a hand on the blonde’s shoulder.

She snapped her head towards him. “But we’re-”

“Doctor,” he glanced over at Yaz before jerking his head to the door.

“O-Okay,” the Doctor sighed sadly and stood up. She merely looked over Yaz one more time before briskly walking out.

“I’ll keep an eye on her,” Graham gently patted Yaz on the shoulder before leaving. She was grateful for him picking up on stuff that she couldn’t, and not having too much pity laced in his voice. However, there was now a bit of an awkward silence between her and her friend. It was almost  bearable . Almost.

“Apparently she was uh, worse for wear when she found out about you,” Ryan whispered, looking down at his hands. She was thankful he had been the one to break the tension, but did he have to mention  _ her _ like she was a kicked puppy?

“And I’m not now?” Yaz muttered, frustration evident in her tone. She sighed, shaking her head. “S-Sorry Ryan. I-It's been a long day-”

“What happened Yaz?” he asked suddenly, finally looking her in the eyes. “One moment we were at the market, waiting for you, the next it turned out you had been kidnapped by this time travelling mad woman.”

“I-I don’t know,” she whispered, biting her lip to stop herself from crying. “T-They drugged me at the m-market... I-I can’t remember much...”

“Do you remember what they did to you? Did they even feed you?”

“I don’t know,” she snapped, yet there was a crack in her voice as a tear rolled down her cheek. “I-I don’t want to talk about it. O-Okay?”

“Okay,” he nodded, looking away from her again. “H-How did you escape though?”

“L-Lilah...”

“Who?”

“A girl... S-She kind of looked after me... She put me into a t-teleport and s-sent me here... She g-got the timing wrong though...”

“You weren’t meant to be gone a month?”

Yaz shook her head. Before she could say anymore on the subject her family ran through the door. As soon as  Najia saw her she bolted towards her and embraced her into a hug. They both started crying immediately, not being able to hold back any more.

“I-I’ll go, see  ya soon Yaz,” Ryan said quietly as he stood up. Yaz noticed her father smile and shake hands with him as he left, but kept his eyes on her.

Sonya stumbled through, assumingly she was the one left to lock the car, and hugged both her and  Najia as soon as she saw them, tears running down her face. Josh spoke to Hakim about what had happened, but from what Yaz heard, besides the sobbing of the three, was that she could leave. She could finally go home.


	8. Safe

Yaz spent the night curled up on the sofa with Najia, and majority of the next day. Najia, although she didn’t want to, had to go to work. She said she would have called in sick, or even explain the situation, but since Yaz had been missing she took too many sick days, and had threats of being fired. Yaz was okay with it though, she needed some time to herself at home. Since she got back there were multiple questions bombarded on her that she couldn’t answer. Any time she tried she would scratch at her arm, pause, and then burst into tears. It quickly became clear that she didn’t want to speak of the incident, so her family backed off. 

Sonya hugged her as gently as she could for a bit, before she had to go to work, and then Najia took over, hugging her for fifteen minutes before Hakim pried her off to send her to work. Yaz wondered when Sonya got a job, and at the time didn’t even think to ask where she worked. She made a mental note to try to ask when she got back, if she could get any words out. Any time she tried to hold a conversation she would go silent, some word that either she or anyone used would trigger an unwanted memory, and she spent most of her concentration on not having some sort of breakdown at least five times in the last hour, rather than on whoever was speaking to her.

Yaz just wanted to sleep for the rest of the day, all of the sleep she didn’t or barely had for the past four months finally catching up to her, but she knew she couldn’t. It had been brought to her attention that a home call doctor wanted to check her over, guessing she’d want to stay at home for as long as possible. Hakim stayed home to answer the door and explain the situation a bit more, and help Yaz answer any questions if she needed it. She was thankful for that, knowing she wouldn’t be able to do this on her own.

“Mr. Khan?” she heard a man at the door. Odd, she didn’t even hear a knock. Yaz sat up slowly on the sofa, only now realizing she had one arm stuck out above her head as she somewhat slept. Shaking her head, she refused to fixate on the reason she did that and focused on the man entering the living room, having a light conversation with her dad.

“Yaz this is Dr. Knowles, and the station sent him to look over you, check for any injuries. Is that okay?”

“Do I have a choice,” she mumbled grouchily as she rubbed at her eyes. She paused, and slowly looked up at the two men, eyes wide and pleading. “S-Sorry, I d-didn-”

“It’s okay,” the doctor gave a lighthearted chuckle as he waved his hand dismissively. “Don’t worry about it, you’re tired. And probably emotionally exhausted. I did tell them it was too soon for this given the situation; however, it would be easier to identify any injuries, external or internal now rather than later when they’ve healed. May I sit?”

“Um, s-sure,” Yaz gestured to the seat next to her. He took it and put his briefcase on the coffee table.

“Do you want anything to drink doctor? Tea? Coffee?” Hakim asked.

Dr. Knowles glanced at Yaz when she flinched, and looked rather puzzled. “Doesn’t look like I should.”

“What?”

“Yasmin, are you-”

“Y-Yaz,” she corrected, the memory of Mya calling her Yasmin in that sinister voice burnt into her mind. “P-Please, call me Yaz.”

“Okay, I will,” he smiled. “Is there anything else that we should address before we get started?”

She hesitated, hands fumbling in her lap nervously as she avoided eye contact. “C-Could we uh,” she licked her lips, and gulped, throat going dry. “C-Could we not say ‘doctor’?”

They looked confused, and concerned, but the doctor nodded. “Yes, we can do that. You can call me either Knowles or Henry. Up to you.”

“T-Thanks,” she smiled slightly.

“So, uh, tea?” Hakim asked slowly, unsure if he should speak.

“If it’s not too much trouble,” Knowles smiled up at him. “Two sugars, splash of milk. Thanks.”

“No problem,” he said as he headed off to the kitchen.

“So, Yaz,” he turned his attention to her. “Do you know of any injuries? Or any possible ones or anything resulting from injury? Like a bruise or anything?”

Yaz glanced down at her arms. She had looked in the mirror the night before to see how many markings there were. The ones around her wrists were the deepest, whereas the ones along her arms and the two on her legs were rather faint. Her legs were barely restraint, and her arms would only be if she moved around too much during one of the experiments.

“Um,” she gulped. “I uh, h-have some on my arms,” she said quietly as she subconsciously rubbed her hand on her arm slowly. “F-From restraints...”

“Oh?” Knowles looked very concerned about that. “Do you mind if I...?”

She nodded and slowly took her jacket off. He cautiously grabbed one and examined it, putting light pressure on each mark. Yaz flinched when he touched the one on her wrist, however lightly he did.

“Sorry,” he muttered as he grazed his finger past it again before letting go. “That one on your wrist is deep. The skin looks very irritated and is quite blistered. I can get some cream for that to ease any discomfort it might be causing you, and to help it heal. It’ll take a while but it should be back to normal.”

“O-Okay-”

“Here’s your... Tea,” Hakim appeared, but almost trailed off when he noticed the bruise on his daughters left arm and the markings from the restraints on both arms. It occurred to her that she hadn’t told her family about them, let alone shown them. It must have come to a shock to him. He shook his head once he realized he was staring. “S-Sorry.”

Yaz didn’t respond, she merely slipped her jacket back on and wrapped her arms around herself.

“Thank you,” Knowles smiled as he grabbed the cup and sipped at it. “Is it okay for your father to be here?”

“Y-Yeah, if h-he wants,” she glanced up at him slightly.

“I uh,” he continued to stare at her arms. “I can yeah. If that’s alright?”

Yaz nodded. “S-So uh, where can I g-get this cream?”

“I’ll write down anything you need at the end,” the doctor said as he waved his hand dismissively.

“W-Won’t I still need to know,” she stopped, noticing the irritated tone in her voice. Sighing shakily, she glanced up at Knowles, her voice timid. “S-Sorry, I uh, I didn’t mean to-”

“What are you apologizing for?” he gave a confused look as he opened the brief case. There was a moment of awkward silence as she thought of a reason, her mouth opened slightly as her eyes darted side to side.

“Um... M-Manners?”

“You did nothing wrong Yaz,” Hakim said as he sat on the arm of the chair, and gently placed her hand on her shoulder.

“Um...”

“It’s okay, you don’t have to explain yourself,” the doctor smiled. “Not to rush, but can we get along with the check up?”

Yaz nodded and braced herself. It was a normal routine check for when people go to the hospital, and some things she saw the first aid person at the station did to people who had come in from an attack. He even said he had to take pictures for the police to look over so they can figure out the case. She didn’t mind, and knew it would happen eventually. There was still a pang of guilt in her chest at that, knowing they’ll never solve it. Or somehow get the wrong people. That was very unlikely though, and Yaz would stop it if it did.

About two hours later Knowles left, leaving a list of things for either her or a family member to get. She wasn’t allowed outside. Not that she wanted to go anywhere. Knowles also talked about a therapist that could come to her home, a Lisa Parry. He refrained from calling her Doctor Parry, and assured her if she decided to talk to her he would say that using that word was a trigger word of sorts, which she would understand. She appreciated that.

“Sorry about freezing,” Hakim said after he had left. “I uh, didn’t think-”

“It’s okay dad,” Yaz smiled slightly. “It’s only natural.”

“Do you want anything-”

There was a knock at the door. Yaz froze for a second, her mind suddenly going to worst case scenario. Luckily it was shut down when she heard a familiar voice.

“Hello,” Graham greeted, sounding rather nervous. “Sorry to just come over like this, but we were wondering if we could talk to Yaz?”

“Um, I don’t know if she wants comp-”

“It’s alright dad, they can come in,” she called out, yet only realized her mistake when she heard the door close. Hakim said he’ll leave them be and went to his room. She cautiously looked around the sofa to see Ryan and Graham walking over to her. No blonde hair. That was good.

“Hey,” Graham greeted softly. “Can we sit?”

“Go ahead,” Yaz smiled as she gestured to the seats. “H-Hey guys.”

“Hi,” Ryan said awkwardly as he sat down on the chair.

“I-I’m sorry for snapping at you yesterday...”

“It’s alright,” he smiled up at her slightly, still unsure of how to speak. “I shouldn’t've talked about it too soon.”

“How are you Yaz?” Graham asked, seeming rather apprehensive as he leant forward, his hands resting on his lap.

“S-Struggling I guess,” Yaz sighed as she slumped back into the sofa, too tired to keep up the charade. “Sorry, I ju-just... Ugh.”

“Yaz?” her friends questioned worriedly when she covered her face with her hands, trying not to cry. It hadn’t worked.

“S-Sorry,” she sobbed rather quietly. They were at her side immediately, and she felt Graham put a hand on her shoulder, whereas Ryan wrapped an arm around her. “S-Sorry, I can’t... I-I h-hate this...”

“It’s okay,” Graham shushed her, an attempt to calm her down. Surprisingly, his soothing voice worked and after a few deep, albeit shaky, breathes, she calmed down and wiped at her tears. “We’re here for you now, okay? If you need us just text Ryan and we’ll be right over. Won’t we?”

“Yeah, we’re your mates,” he nudged her. “We’re here for you, always.”

“T-Thanks guys,” she sniffled, a small smile on her face. It fell when she realized she would have to bring  _ her _ up, if not for herself then for them. She sighed. “Um... I-Is she going to turn up?”

“Probably not no,” Graham said sadly as he moved his arm back to his lap. “She uh, explained how the... Mya person worked, and how much she hates her. She knew she’d er, try to make you hate her too, or worse... So-”

“So, she knows not to see me,” Yaz concluded. She couldn’t help but sound relieved, despite hating the revelation. She knew how hurt the Doctor must have been, but couldn’t bring herself to care. It was frustrating. “I-I can’t see her...”

“She knows, yeah,” Ryan nodded. “Um, but like Gramps said, we’ll be here.”

“Y-Yeah...”

“Remember,” Graham started, a bit uneasy. “If you er, need to talk about it – not now, if it’s too soon,” he paused when Yaz gave him a pointed look. “You can always talk to us. Since y’know, a therapist won’t really believe it...”

“Y-Yeah, I-I know,” she looked away from him at her lap, a tear threatening to fall. “I’m sorry guys, b-but can y-you-”

“I’m back,” Najia announced as she walked through the door, and stopped once she saw her daughter’s friends. “Oh, hello.”

“Hey,” Graham stood up and gave a small wave at her. “We were just checking up on Yaz, and leaving actually.”

“Where have you two been the past month?”

Yaz froze. She hated what her mum was insinuating, but realized there was no excuse for them being missing for a month too, and now sat by her side. In a way it made sense, in a very, very irritating way.

“On holiday,” Graham replied, a little hurt at the accusation. “We came back yesterday then got a call from Yaz. We were worried and came right over.”

“I didn’t see you at the station,” she raised a brow.

“I was with our other friend, she er, didn’t handle seeing Yaz like that well...”

“Why isn’t she here now?”

“I asked h-her not to be,” Yaz rolled her eyes.

“Why? I thought you liked her?”

“Well... B-Before I...” she squeezed her eyes shut, collecting her thoughts. “We got in a bit of an a-argument before...”

“I’m sure whatever that argument was can be pushed aside-”

“I can’t have her here mum!”

It fell silent. She could feel everyone staring at her, didn’t even need to look up to know they looked concerned at her. Maybe even pity her. She remembered talking to her mum about the blonde, and now she couldn’t even say her name. It must have been unsettling for  Najia , and maybe make her a suspect. That would be more plausible than Graham or Ryan having anything to do with it. Her on the other hand, came crashing into her life one day and claimed to be friends. It made sense to be wary of her with how Yaz was acting. She  realised how she acted, how she yelled at her mum when all she wanted to do was make sure she was okay. How much attitude she had given  her.

_ “Oh, you really shouldn’t have done that.” _

She froze, the tears in her eyes falling down her face when she remembered Mya’s words. She’d always say that at first when she would protest or raise her voice at her or Lilah. How she would look at her, devious smirk plastered on her face. Loving what she was about to do to reprimand her for her outbursts. She always had new ideas, each one more daunting than the last.

Yaz couldn’t help it. She was exhausted, overwhelmed, emotional and in pain. She covered her face with her hands and tucked her legs to her chest, feet on the edge of the sofa. She couldn’t control it. What made matters worse she felt a light, spine chilling touch along her shoulder that she couldn’t apply pressure to without revealing too much. It frustrated her. Scared her. Made her tremble as she relived a glimpse of that sightless torture. She really couldn’t help it.

She burst out crying.

* * *

The Doctor was nervous as she leant on the doors of the TARDIS. She didn’t want to be here, but her ship disagreed. It had only been five months since Yaz was found, she was probably still not wanting to acknowledge here, probably still scared of her, or even hated her. She sighed as she hit her head against the doors, closing her eyes, trying to think of how to do this. Of what to say. Of how to say it.

“Doctor?”

She snapped her head up to see Najia standing there, a confused look on her face as she stared at her. “Oh, h-hi...”

“What are you doing here?”

“Um...” she looked down, and noticed a small white plastic bag in her hands. “What’s that?”

“Oh, medicine for Yaz,” Najia raised it slightly. “And this stupid cream.”

“Cream?”

“Yeah, for her wrists,” she glanced down, seemingly batting away tears.

“Her wrists?” the Doctor cautiously pushed herself off the doors and walked to her. “Whats-”

“Dr. Knowles gave her a prescription for this cream that is supposed to ease any irritation and help her skin heal. She’s only used it twice, saying it stings too much when she applies it and used the first one last month.”

“Um, I think I can get one that can heal it quicker,” the blonde bit her lower lip, a calculating look on her face. “Pretty sure.”

“Really?” Najia looked up at her. “How quick?”

“Would you believe a day?”

“I would not,” she shook her head, but paused when she heard the door to the building open, only to see Yaz at the door. They all froze like deer in headlights when they saw each other. “Yaz what are you doing?”

She groaned and rolled her eyes and walked towards them, the Doctor took a step or two back. “I was going to the shops okay?”

“Can’t you wait till tomorrow? I can’t go out today and-”

“You don’t have to go with me everywhere mum,” she groaned, crossing her arms. “I’m sick of being house bound.”

“I have work in half an hour, and Sonya’s still at work-”

“And Dad’s busy I know-”

“You... I don’t want you going out alone-”

“Maybe I want to be alone for a bit? Maybe I want to be outside-”

“Yaz-”

“I haven’t been outside properly in nine months!” Yaz raised her voice, yet wavered when she realized she revealed too much. The Doctor caught onto that, luckily her mother didn’t.

“Stop exaggerating,” Najia sighed, clearly getting annoyed at her daughter. “What about your friends?”

“They’re busy-”

“Well then you’ll have to wait until tomor-”

“I can’t go back insi-”

“I’ll go.”

The two women looked at the blonde, as if they had forgotten she was there in the first place. She stood there with her hands shoved into her pockets as she swayed on her heels. 

“You... What?” Najia asked after some silence.

“I’ll uh, keep her company, look after her,” she shifted under their gaze, and looked down at her feet. “If you want...”

There was a pause as they glanced at each other before looking back at the blonde, and she just wanted to run for the TARDIS. Of course, Yaz wasn’t ready to see her yet. She shouldn’t even be there in the first place. She shouldn’t-

“S-Sure.”

She snapped her head up, shock evident in her features as she stared at Yaz. “Really?”

“I hate being cooped up,” she smiled slightly and then looked at her mother. “I’ll keep my phone on and text you when I get home.”

“You better,” she sighed and kissed her on the forehead before turning to the blonde. “Look after her.”

“I will,” she nodded. “Promise.”

“See you tomorrow,” Najia waved at them before heading to the apartment building.

The Doctor waved at her before turning to Yaz nervously. “Um... You lead?”

“You didn’t have to do that-”

“I wanted to,” she affirmed. “If you don’t want me with you though, I can go...”

Yaz sighed and took a step closer. “You can come with me D-Doctor, just,” she looked over her. She was hunched over, appearing smaller than usual, and had a guilty look on her face. “Not too close okay?”

The Doctor nodded fervently, a grin on her face. “Yup!”

“W-Want to a café?”

“Sure, anything you want,” she gestured for Yaz to go first, to lead them to a café since she knew the area, and it would be easier to not stand too close if she were following rather than leading. Yaz sighed and walked on ahead, glancing behind her when she got to the road to see the Doctor staying at least three steps behind her.

“Doctor not like that,” she stopped and turned to her, seemingly annoyed yet had a small smirk on her face. “It looks like you’re following me. Just stay to my side.”

She tilted her head to the side. “But... You said not too close and that-”

“Just don’t touch me, okay?” Yaz raised her voice, irritation evident in her tone. The Doctor flinched. Yaz had been annoyed at her before when they first met, and a few times after that, but it would be replaced by confusion or adoration a second later, and not combined with an icy glare. When she didn’t answer Yaz rolled her eyes and walked off, seemingly impatient.

“Wait up!” the Doctor called as she ran up to her, settling down at her pace at her side. She wasn’t too close that their elbows would touch if she swayed, which was a great possibility at that moment with how she would stumble over her own feet if she wasn’t paying attention. 

There was tension between them as they walked, one that made the blonde acutely aware of every movement they made. Every time Yaz looked in her direction for a moment before focusing in front of her. Every time she subtly stepped further away from the Doctor. When she flinched when the blonde would sway, sometimes her coat brushing against her leg. It hurt. Instead of focusing on trying to talk, trying to express her guilt, she focused on walking. One step at a time. She only stopped when an arm stretched out in front of her, lightly hitting her in the chest.

The Doctor snapped her head up and took a step back when she saw Yaz tense at the contact. She looked around and noticed they were at a crossing, the walking signal red and cars drove past.

“You should watch where you’re going,” Yaz sighed as she moved her arm back to her side, keeping her eyes on the road.

“Oh yeah,” she muttered, shoving her hands in her pockets, gripping onto the mobile that Yaz had given her before for comfort. She hated having empty pockets, nothing to hold onto or fiddle with when she got nervous. Luckily, she hadn’t emptied them yet since the market, and realized she still had the mint sweets she was going to give her, before Mya got in the way. 

“The café isn’t far,” Yaz brought her out of her thoughts as they walked across the zebra crossing to the road. “Guessing you don’t have money?”

“Not earth money no-”

“How long has it been for you?”

The Doctor stopped, noticing Yaz had slowed down too. “Um,” she looked up as she figured it out, or at least pretended to. “Since the station? A week or so.”

“So you jumped ahead,” Yaz concluded with a small nod, and then frowned as she looked away and kept walking. “How long was it...”

She trailed off, her voice losing her irritated edge to it. Fortunately, the Doctor understood what she was getting at. “Only a few hours... We were trying to track you down then Ryan got the call...”

“Hmm,” she nodded slightly before speeding up, seeing the café just down the road. Instead of trying to come up with some apology, the blonde merely sped up, following her to the small café.

The little bell dinged as they walked in, that made both of the women jump. They hadn’t expected that. Yaz looked a bit uneasy at the startle, but gained her composure as she walked off to the counter.

“Black coffee please,” she turned to the blonde, looking her in the eye for the first time. “What do you want?”

“Oh, um, hot chocolate?”

“Hot chocolate please,” Yaz addressed the barista before getting her purse out.

“Cream and marshmallows?” she asked, glancing at the blonde.

“Yeah,” Yaz answered for her as she gave the woman a five-pound note. “You can go and sit at the table.”

“Are you sur-”

“Yes.”

The Doctor nodded and twirled around, looking for a table for them to sit at. She found one in the corner with two seats by a book case that looked like it hadn’t been touched in weeks. Settling down, she glanced round the café, seeing only two families there, and three couples all spread out. Wasn’t too crowded, she noted. If anything did happen, she would notice. Not that she was expecting anything to happen. However, she was still on edge. She was always switching between being dazed and lost in her own head that she became unobservant, or highly aware of everything. There was no in-between. 

Two mugs being set on the table got her attention. “Here,” Yaz pushed the hot chocolate to her.

“Thanks,” she muttered as she took it. All Yaz did was nod as she sat down, not really looking at her. She took a sip of her coffee, but it was too hot so she put it back down. She looked anxious.

The blonde didn’t know what to do. She wanted to say something. Anything. But what? An apology? Distract her from the incident with a rambling of her time with Ada Lovelace. She decided against it. If Yaz wanted to talk about something she’d talk first, she’d choose the subject she was comfortable with. She tapped her foot against the chair leg as she looked round, and out the window. The silence was unbearable.

“I’m-”

“Yo-”

They both paused, staring at each other when t hey spoke at the same time. The Doctor waved her hand, “You go first.”

“No, you,” Yaz shook her head.

“I’m sorry,” she sighed. “Deeply sorry, truly. I know I can’t just apologize and it’ll all be okay, it’ll change anything, help in anyway but I... I should have found you sooner, come with you instead of messing with Runt and looking at sweets for the picnic-”

“Sweets for the picnic?”

The Doctor looked up at the confused brunette. “Oh yeah, I got sweets for everyone. I actually still have yours,” she said as she fished the small box from her pocket and slowly slide it towards her. 

“Oh, uh thanks,” she smiled slightly. “Wait, I remember now. W-We were going to do a picnic... That would have been nice...”

“We could do it at some point,” the blonde suggested. “Find somewhere here, if you don’t want to travel. Have a nice picnic with the boys.”

“That would be nice yeah,” Yaz cautiously opened the box, smiling down at the sweets.

“They’re strawberry and mint type sweets, and have a nice swirl on them. Reminded me of those strawberry ones you said you liked but could never get anymore, so I thought... Are you okay?”

Yaz was frowning as she looked at them, as if she were in deep thought, not fully aware of her surroundings. “Huh?”

“Are you okay?” she asked softly, and looked down at the pink box. “Did I get it wrong? Do you not like them?”

“No, no, these are great. Really thoughtful,” she smiled slightly, clearly forced. “It’s just,” she glanced around. “Can we uh, go to the TARDIS?”

“Oh, sure. Do you want to finish your coffee first?”

“Yeah,” Yaz nodded as she took a sip. She closed up the box and passed it back to the blonde, who looked uneasy at the movement. “I don’t have big pockets.”

“Oh, right yeah,” she smiled bashfully and pocketed the sweets. 

They sat silence after that, each drinking their beverage. The Doctor noticed her occasionally scratching her arm, subtly, but not enough for her not to notice. She would lightly run her fingers along her jacket, and then applied more pressure. She looked frustrated. Unfortunately, the blonde could guess what set of tortures that was from.

Once they got to the TARDIS, again in uncomfortable silence, Yaz looked around the console room, as if she were inspecting it. The Doctor stayed by an arch, leaning on it as she took it all in again. Yaz broke the silence with a sigh, her voice rather quiet and subdued.

“It’s weird,” she frowned, not looking at the blonde. “She said you were the destroyer of worlds, the Oncoming Storm. You saved people but never thought of the consequences, never thought of the other side. Believed in fairytales that were changed throughout the ages. That you could burn a planet with a press of a button, without batting an eye.”

“Yaz-”

“Yet you do all of this,” she gestured to the center of the console. “Take people on adventures, take care of them. Care about their feelings. Apologize for things you can’t control... Remember things that I said once and buy me something I love that I would never think of buying myself. You... You’re too sweet sometimes... It’s weird.”

The Doctor stayed silent, letting her carry on with her ramblings. 

“Everything’s so contradicting in my head,” Yaz shook her head. “I know you’re... I know you won’t hurt us, won’t leave us. Hell, you came back even though you knew I needed space. You’re so considerate. Yet what she said has still got its effect, still lingering in the back of my mind. Still telling me it was your fault I went through hell. How I can’t even talk to a professional about what happened, how it’s affected me. I can’t ease my family’s mind that I’ll be okay out by myself, that no human did that to me. I have to watch my colleagues try to hunt my captors down, yet they will never find out who did this to me. Who kept me tied constantly that I can’t sleep without having my arm past my head, tied to the headboard or not, and that’s even if I can sleep without feeling like she can come into my room whenever she wants. Come after my family...”

“Yasmin I-”

“Don’t call me that.”

“Okay, okay I won’t Yaz,” she said softly, taking a step forward but halted when Yaz flinched. “I’m so so sorry you had to go through that. Please tell me what I can do.”

“There’s nothing you can do,” she sighed.

“I have to try-”

“You can’t,” Yaz snapped. “It’s not like you can erase everything that  happened .”

“I uh... Could do that actually. Take away the trauma-”

“You can’t. My family  kno ... Everyone knows. I have physical stuff too. I keep scratching at my arms, feeling light ghost touches on me at random times in the day.”

“That should go-”

“How would you know?”

“Um, well that specific torture tactic happened to me once,” she shifted as she looked down, not wanting to see her face. “From a species like Mya, just more focused on torturing high level aliens. They break them, sell them, trade them. Luckily, they didn’t get that far with me. Just had me for a day or two, their time, but they did that for eighty hours, or so I was told when it was finished. Honestly it felt like years. Shook me up a bit, which was surprising considering I’ve been through worst for longer. Thankfully, I was there to be a spy of sorts, and the people who sent me got me out of there, but I still had that side effect for a while. I stayed away until it was over, didn’t want you to see me like that  y’know ? That’s why I skipped and came here today, well, the TARDIS made me, but I wanted to see if Mya had done that to you. But I  don‘ t want to make you uncomfortable by being here, or make you scared.”

Yaz just stared at her, shock, concern, and guilt on her face. She didn’t know what to say. The Doctor shrugged as she took a step forward cautiously, thankful that she didn’t flinch or step back this time. As she got  closer, she could see tears in her eyes, threatening to spill.

“I can’t say I know exactly what happened to you or how to cope with it,” she said softly. “But if you need someone to talk to about anything I’ll be here. And you know Ryan and Graham are here for you too. If you don’t want to talk to us about certain things, then I can get an intergalactic therapist that works with patients who have undergone torture like that. She’s really nice and won’t force you to say or do anything. And if there’s anything you don’t want to hear – like a trigger word – then I can tell her ahead of time. But this is only if you want to. I don’t want to pressure you into anything Yaz.”

She didn’t say anything. She just stared at her with an unreadable expression. Maybe shock. Maybe relief? Maybe even guilt. The Doctor couldn’t tell. The silence stretched on a bit, but before she could talk again Yaz pulled her in for a tight hug. Stunned, yet relieved, she hugged back and soothingly stroked her back when she heard her sob.

“I-I’m sorry Doctor,” Yaz sobbed as she held onto the blonde. “I-I... I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay Yaz, really,” she smiled as she calmed her down. “Want me to set up an appointment with Hyacinth Lester?”

Yaz nodded meekly. “Please.”

“Consider it done.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's finally done! I might do a sequel one shot or something about how Yaz copes, will anyone be interested in that?

**Author's Note:**

> As always Kudos and Comments are greatly appreciated!


End file.
